Hard Work, His Strength

Life with a large family is very busy. When you factor in the issues that adopted children can bring with them life can be especially busy. Often I post only the good times and not so much the challenges we face, but that can be misleading. I regularly follow a blog entitled "Smiles and Trials" authored by a Christian mom whose family is made up of 16 kids, some biological and the rest adopted (several kids are from adoptions that did not work out, some are from Ukraine, etc.). I find much encouragement in the truthful smiles and especially the honest trials posted in that blog. So now and in the future I will include some of our challenges along with our joys in this crazy, busy life we live for the Lord.

Here Anna was helping me do "school" with Slava. When he sees us doing school he comes to me and asks, "Slava school?" So I pull out something schoolish for him to do. We've been working on number recognition and he's getting pretty good with numbers 1-7. He can count to 14 or 15 but doesn't recognize all of the digits. He's getting pretty good with colors too. It's amazing that he's been home 5 months now. Last week Slava had an appt with our pediatrician. It was a follow-up to a visit a couple of months ago. The doctor wanted to make sure he's gaining weight. Spending the first 5 years of life in an orphanage results in an under-weight kid. He's been eating very well and appears to us to be filling out and growing, but according to the doctor's scale Slava only gained 6 ounces in the past 2 months! The doc ordered blood work to make sure his levels are all up to par and recommended a nutritionist. The blood work I'm trying to arrange to have drawn in the hospital in June when he goes for his eye muscle surgery. The nutritionist part I'm not sure is necessary. The doctor never ordered up all this stuff for Jordan and he's always been tiny. In fact, Jordan's grown more in the past year than in the first 3 years combined! I think Slava has the metabolism of a race horse. The kid goes non-stop from 6:30am to 8pm. Like Jordan, one of his favorite daily activities is rocking. Slava will go into my room during the day, turn on the I-Pod, hop on my bed, and rock. The other day he invited me to rocky also. I gave it a shot and cannot believe how much of a work-out it is! It takes every muscle in the body to rock. I think Slava burns off every calorie he eats! (I might start rocking daily too!) The pediatrician wants to see him again on June 1st prior to his surgery. My plan is to pump him full of healthy calories so he'll tip the scales...at least another few ounces!

Sierra on the left.

Last weekend Sierra & Andrii traveled to Canada for a semi-knockdown karate tournament. Sierra placed 2nd (out of 2)! It was her first competition and the adrenaline was really pumping. She took a few too many penalty shots (punches) to her opponent's face. Apparently punching in the face is not allowed only kicking!

Andrii on the left.

Andrii placed 2nd. The guy in first knocked Andrii out with a kick to the head, but he rallied and got 2nd after facing the guy in 3rd. It might sound a bit rough but we signed the kids up for Karate For Christ over a year ago. The Sensei is Pastor Calvin Ortiz and not only does he train them in karate, but he also focuses on biblical principals as well. Pride is something he really zeros in on and it seems Andrii has been struggling with it. He's asked to quit (a few weeks before the tournament), but we told him that quitting isn't something we do. Sensei talked with him on the way home from Canada, but the excuses Andrii gives aren't legitimate. Tonight he was conveniently missing when their ride came to pick him and Sierra up. When he finally did emerge from the woods we told him he was grounded for a week. He said that was ok and that he wasn't going to karate next week either. We informed him that he is going next week and that we will be meeting with Pastor Calvin, and we sent him to his room for the night. Andrii is a great kid, but he does not like to be corrected. He's very talented and athletic and basically good at everything. But he does not like to be corrected. I see it when he gets a few math problems wrong and I require him to re-do them. Sensei was really putting the pressure on the kids who were training for the tournament (which he volunteered to go on). However, Andrii never bothered to attend the additional practices like the other kids. He got knocked on his butt which looks to me like God humbling the proud. He's always been a pretty compliant kid the past 4 years, but recently we've been detecting a bit of an attitude. Ahhhh teenagers!

I came across this verse the other day: I work very hard at this, as I depend on Christ's mighty power that works within me. Colossians 1:29. This has become my morning prayer - asking the Lord for His strength to do what he's called me to do. It is not easy raising kids, especially kids who arrive at your door with baggage...the emotional kind. Missy arrived at or door 12 years ago. Actually the Lord picked her up and placed her in our family. It was a very miraculous placement. She's actually a 3rd cousin to me. My grandmother and her grandmother were sisters. Missy's mom died when she was 6, her father had abandoned the family when she was an infant, and she was raised for about 3 years by her grandmother who emotionally and verbally abused her (something I actually witnessed). We put her in Christian counseling as soon as she was placed with us. Her grandmother never allowed Missy to grieve the loss of her mother because she couldn't see beyond her own loss. Missy packed down these wounds which only festered because she didn't deal with them. We formally adopted her after her grandmother passed away, but from day 1 we treated her as one of our own. She did everything and had everything just like all the other kids. Something was different though. Because of the festering wounds, because of the lies she believed about herself, because of her past she behaved differently. Almost daily she was either not doing what she was supposed to be doing or doing what she wasn't supposed to be doing. She's always been passive-rebellious. And when she was corrected, grounded, or issued consequences, instead of learning from her poor choices she retreated into her self as the victim believing that if she only had her mother these things wouldn't be happening to her. This victim-mentality effected everything she did, said, and believed. But what happens when one grows up and still operates bound by the chains of the past? The trouble they find themselves in by their own poor choices is bigger then the consequences of not brushing their teeth, not doing their homework, not doing their chores, not telling truth, etc. Missy landed herself in big trouble last spring and again last fall. This caused us to insist on her going to counseling again which she submitted to for a time. The past few months have been very difficult with her behavior worsening. Finding her biological father not long ago and experiencing his rejection again didn't help. She put a plan together a few months ago to move out and has been working toward that goal. This week she did move out. She's almost 21 and maybe it's time, but we're very concerned for her. Unless she gets help, unless she wants help, she will continue in the same pattern. We don't want to see her hurt or in trouble. She is our daughter and we want only the very best for her. We want her to be free of the past, free of the lies of the enemy, free to be all God created her to be. And that freedom is possible only one way for Jesus said,

"The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, for He has appointed me to preach Good News to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the down trodden will be freed from their oppressors, and that the time of the Lord's favor has come." Luke 4:18-19

I have really been pressing into prayer for Missy (and many others are as well). Every time I ask Him what I should do I keep getting the same answer: Speak Truth & Pray. This is what I am doing. If the Son sets you free, you are free indeed.